Meet Alexis, who, early in life, recognized that her male body did not match her female soul. The strength of her self-awareness allowed her to eventually be true to herself.

I am grateful to Alexis for sharing her story with me. As a result, I have a greater understanding of the transgender community and its issues. I hope that those who see this exhibition will better understand that there are many ways to be human.

Gary Watson

I knew there was something different when I was younger, you know, seven, eight, nine. But I didn’t know exactly what it was. I knew I was drawn to certain things like clothing, you know. And I didn’t understand why because it was what my mom wore. But I was like my dad. There’s a lot of that social institutionalized way of thinking…like if you’re born a boy, you’re a boy -- you’re born a girl, you’re a girl. That’s just what you know even though you know something’s not right. --Alexis

Through a lot of my teenage years growing up… I just kinda really suppressed that quite extensively. I guess into my twenties is where I really started exploring what was going on, and I didn’t even know the term “transgender” then. With my ex-wife… something happened in that time, and it really triggered… we were just having fun like a Halloween show or party… and we reversed roles. I slipped right into feminine mannerisms, subtle things. It was like I was hiding those for so long, it was, like, this is what I really need to do. --Alexis

I was still a little bit in denial because I had a lot of fears about my family, my work, what’s going to happen with all that? It brings other aspects of your life into transitioning physically, transitioning in your career, or with family and friends because they have to transition with you—hopefully if they’re supportive and understanding and accepting, then they make the effort to make that adjustment and change in their lives—you know, along with you. --Alexis

My first band and the band I was in prior to Project Armageddon, and the very beginning of Project Armageddon as well, I was still male -- identifying as a man on stage -- and in my job, of course. Pretty much everything outside of that, you know, was living as a woman…around the house, go out to the LGBT bars or clubs and stuff like that because I was safe there and accepted there. --Alexis

I was a Harley-Davidson mechanic for about 14-1/2 years. I had a meeting with my employer and came out to them…about how I was living, and that I… was making this transition full-time; and I was going to be coming to work and identifying as a woman at work, you know? They were okay with it. They just wanted to make sure that they were set on their end legal-wise. I guess in case things happened, they wanted to know how to address issues. --Alexis

Initially I had some issues with my parents… It was very odd to me because my parents were always very open-minded people and had gay friends. I think the transgender issue was something new to them, and I think it was one of those things -- all of a sudden it’s in your house, it’s under your roof; this elephant in the room is just, like, right here now… now all of a sudden… it’s your family, it’s you. --Alexis

I went to lunch with my mom; and we were sitting outside this little café and having a beer waiting for our food; and a group of ladies came out and were leaving; and one of them was my mom’s hairdresser… My mom’s, like, “Hey, I’d like for you to meet my daughter, Alexis.” It was the first time I’ve heard my mom introduce me as her daughter to somebody. So it was like a very ah…yeah. I still get worked up a little bit about that. That particular moment was -- so that was a really great, great moment, you know. --Alexis

Another fear that held me back was that I was going to have to quit playing music because I didn’t think anybody would accept me in the metal scene as a transgender musician, you know… in metal. And that’s what I played and what I loved playing. And I read an article in a magazine…in a metal magazine…about another trans woman that had transitioned, and they did a great article on her. And I was, like, “Well, shit, if she’s doing it, why can’t I?” --Alexis

I was a little nervous at first, but I was, like, “I’m going on a stage. I’m just going to be me.” And when people have questions, I’m just going to be upfront and open and honest about it. --Alexis

I know I’ve got this platform. I can use it, and I’m on a stage already and doing interviews and promotions for the bands. So it’s going to come up; I’m going to use it. I can educate and expose other people and to, like, “Hey—we’re just people,” you know? People all the time come up to me at different shows… and it’s, like, “Hey you know, it’s so great—you helped a friend of mine out” or “You helped me out.” That just continually pushes me. I live in such a public kind of oriented world through my transition that I think it differs from a lot of other people. --Alexis

You look at the transgender issue, it’s like a national, international issue now; whereas when I was growing up as a kid, the only thing I ever heard of about a transgender was that you saw them occasionally as a prostitute being in a movie or something like that or being a joke about something like that, you know. Now it’s like people are having everyday conversations about it. It’s a political issue. It’s a cultural and social issue. --Alexis

We use the bathrooms all the time right now next to everybody and nobody knows and there’s never been an incident. --Alexis

And it’s funny because it’s like the religious right that’s, like, really spearheading this a lot. But if you look at the news articles about people molesting kids – look at the priests and the pastors, the religious people. It’s like there’s articles almost everyday about it… You don’t have any issue with a transgender person -- we just wanna piss or shit or what ever we gotta do in there and get out to get back to doing what we’re doing. I’m not a very good political combatant… I’m a musician… This is just me - I wanna piss. I don’t want to be fired because I’m trans ‘cause some company doesn’t like that… I want protections and acceptance passed. --Alexis

A couple of years ago…we stopped at some little country café on the road on the way back -- me and my drummer -- and sat in there and ordered coffee. The waitress took our order and our order never came, and the waitress wouldn’t come back. And you start feeling eyes on you and it’s just like, “What’s going on here?” And my drummer was getting mad. He didn’t realize what was going on. And I was starting to look around, and I was, like, “Let’s go; they’re not going to serve us.” And he’s, like, “What do you mean?” And it was because of me…because I’m transgender… My drummer got mad. I didn’t. I just felt sorry for these people. -- Alexis

I think things have been remarkably well for me through my transition and what I’ve been able to do and accomplish with that. And I’m really excited. I don’t take it for granted at all. It’s like I constantly try to do more for the community and be more visible and out there to help people. --Alexis

There are so many people that are transgender that don’t live it 24/7 that are scared… because of bigotry, hate, prejudices against them, and stuff like that. So, they have to live closeted, you know, in their lives. As soon as they walk through that door into their homes they -- maybe…that’s a safe spot for them. If they’re a child, that’s a different scenario because… it could be family that doesn’t accept that, and so they still have to hide it there. And they’re in a spot where they can only be themselves with a group of friends who know and understand. Or they may not even have that, and they’re just having to live with this all by themselves. --Alexis

We’re just people. We just wanna live life day-to-day like everyone else does… have freedom and respect from other people just like we want to give it to them… and they expect it from us. I don’t want anything super special – most of us just want that day-to-day, you know, where I can go to a job and not worry about being fired or not getting hired simply because you’re trans – be loved by our families and our friends and love our families and our friends in return. --Alexis

Everyone transitions, not necessarily in their gender, but…in different ways in their lives, they transition. --Alexis